Glimpses of hope

This place…… it’s such a f’ed up place but it is definitely doing to me what it’s known for but that’s why it’s “special” I suppose. I saw this bumper sticker in the market the other day and just looked up at the sky and mumbled to myself no shit” and laughed. “Crestone colorado, things are different here” is the sticker and il certainly by at least 3 before I leave because every single time I walk to my car I want to be reminded of it. I can best compare my 6weeks here to my 6ish weeks of basic training. I tried quitting that in week 1, day 2, when I fired my lunch tray at my drill instructor and told him to “blow me”. That was similar to my incident here when I fired my green bay packer mug at the wall near Brian which led to a mess and a damaged mug. Both felt great and only one I regretted. I remember running to the phone booth court after I threw the tray and begging him to get me out and the call was quickly “disconnected” by the words of an angry staff sergeant with a goofy hat asking me if “I lost my fucking mind as I hit the dirt to give him something like 50 pushups as I was slowly being surrounded by 8 of those goofy hat wearing man shapers. Both were kinda humbling experiences but I didn’t realize what humility meant when I was 18 but now I’m closer to 38 and I know it well and try to always be humble because it’s important. I guess this time I didn’t have my dad to run to and that adds a degree of difficulty as well. I don’t want to get into my family stuff because I don’t have anything to add as it’s still “crickets”. Moving on. This week was hard and definitely the hardest yet and I’m tapping out. I realized a ton this week and I’ve known the whole time that every emotion, vibe, manifestation, etc is amplified here but I completely melted as of yesterday. I’ve been thinking and driving myself nuts all week just trying to figure everything out. After the talk from the neighbor the other night I realized that every challenge is happening for its reason and I need to find the lesson in each one. It made sense, my 2nd favorite book of all time is “the alchemist” and all that book is about its just this. One of the lines I’ll always always always remember from that book is “when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” I get chills from that. Just like I manifested this dream I’ve been involved with out here in crestone it seems almost as if God set the puzzle on a tee for me. Maybe I’m crazy but it makes perfect sense to me now but I was too caught up in losing my shit to realize anything. The jeep situation has deflated me and I just kinda gave up on getting out and instead was going to Denver next week to hangout with a friend I met through a retreat I was on out here. It’s a break and it’s all I really want so I was settling and assume that’s all I need to reset. That being said I recieved a random text from the mechanic Tim that kinda blew me off 2weeks ago after I ordered the parts. I’m not mad anymore because his text was an apology and just said he’s here until the 29th and then he has to go to Waykins Glenn to work in the pits, yeah professional pit on the side, and he would get on my car if I wanted. I said yes and that it would mean a lot because I’m really trying to get out of here for a minute. Well he responded that’s what just happened to him. He “went dark” for 10 days and does so every few months here. I immediately forgave him and understood exactly what he meant. That’s what I’m trying to do as well. It’s impossible to describe this place but it’s something I’ve never experienced in my life. If your spiritual and believe in energy and all that stuff than you may get an idea. The locals say it’s from the vortex here and the 60,000 ft. Aquafina resting on a bed of crystals. Others think it’s the peace and solitude that gets to you as this has been measured to be the quietest place on the continent. The geologist arrive here Monday for a week and staying in the dome and their here to measure the energy levels as this has also been measured to have the highest energy levels in world including Tibet. Another article I read wrote more than two dozen ashrams, monasteries, temples, retreat centers, stupas, labyrinths, and other sacred landmarks. There’s even a ziggurat, a structure modeled on the temples of ancient Babylon. I’ve posted pictures of Bernie on the ziggurat because it’s next to the castle. The spiritual Centers here represent faiths that include like Buddhism, Hinduism, Christianity, Native American spiritual traditions(I’m trying todo a peyote ceremony before I leave, and a variety of New Age stuff I still don’t try to understand because it doesn’t matter. Everyone here is “one”. There’s no way i won’t be back, if i ever get to leave, because this place is special and to say i helped create something like this is something I’m proud of because it will change lives without a doubt. It changed mine. Robin and i have also been in contact and things didn’t work out in Mexico and I think I’m really really really really close to getting him back in the states so we can travel together for a while and as we drive and travel we can get going on our books because we both want to write one and both have stories to share, his being 10x’s more incredible than mine. I even suggested that i put up a facebook ad asking someone to tag alone and ghost write both our stories and see the country for free. After what I’ve learned here that would be accepted immediately. I then apologized to him because I realized that I think i manifested that Mexico didn’t workout and we’d get together again. I know for a fact I manifested it actually and I know i manifested the mechanic reaching out to me, side note: after seeing my disabled veteran license plate he texted me about his love for veterans and his grandpa was on Normandy. I sent him a picture of my “22” and “;” and told him my passion is veteran suicide and people that are sad and that i lost my best friend and that’s why I’m here to help find a place for veterans and people to heal like I did. His response “Both my granpdas served one in normady, one in panama, im always here for a good vet in need, I’ll take care of you bud”. That gave me chills as well because i know his words were sincere. All day I’ve known I was going to be leaving so I didn’t do a single thing, only reflected. That’s something I learned is important to do every day and I started slipping and starting attracting negative just like laws of attraction are supposed to work. Fool. Another interested article crossed my desk today. I’ll attach it and if you’ve been following my story then you can refer to what you need to if you need confirmation. If you don’t believe in the moons effect on things than you should read the article as well. https://www.elephantjournal.com/2018/06/emotionally-intense-new-supermoon-triad-causing-major-shifts-disruption/

This article lists verbatim all the chaos in my life. It’s how it was supposed to happen I guess and it all started the night funda and I arrived here on the full moon and I didn’t sleep for 2 days. I’m just gonna leave this here, an important part of the article to me. “

New moons represent the end of one 28-day cycle and the start of a new one, and this lunar event is also the last of an intense and energetic half year. It is a turning point for clearing out old energy from the past six months and is a catalyst for beginning the second half of the year focused on creating space for high-vibrational, positive energy to enter.

New moons can cause us to feel introverted and introspective; however, our need to escape from the manic external world does not necessarily mean we want to be alone, but instead that we do not want to be surrounded by those whose energy feels tense, negative, and who bring us down. We will notice we have the desire to remove ourselves from dynamics that cause friction—and instead, we’ll find we are gravitating toward those with whom we feel peaceful and calm. In short, during this new moon, we will be drawn to those who feel like “home.”

We have gone through many drastic energy shifts lately, which have taken us through personal transformation and caused us to vibrate on an entirely different frequency. This new supermoon brings another major awakening, in which we will see everything around us as though we are viewing and perceiving it all for the first time. This can feel terrifying, as we may suddenly question how we have managed to maintain certain relationships or continue in certain jobs or living arrangements for so long.

Gemini’s moon is giving us the courage to speak our truth, loudly and clearly, and we will intuitively know what we want and where we are heading. We will be looking back over the past six months and understanding why we have been through certain challenges, what they have taught us, and how they have led us to where we are now.

As we go through this deep inner reflection, we will receive a clear vision of where we want the journey through the second half of the year to take us. This could mean that we will need to commit to a dramatic detox of our lives, so that anything that is not aligned with where we want to be when the year ends has to be released.

This is most certainly the time to get rid of any habits, patterns, thoughts, obsessions, commitments, dynamics, or material items that have been weighing us down and keeping us stuck in a reality that it neither healthy or serving us. Anything that no longer resonates with who we are and how we want to be living will start to dissipate before our eyes.

We will be cutting ourselves free from the low-frequency entities that we have become attached to and burning through old paradigms, as well as setting alight a crumbling bridge or two in the process.

This leaves a gateway for those who reflect the same passion and desire to exist free from chaos, harm, and destruction—and for kindred souls who share a similar passion for co-existing harmoniously and lovingly on this planet to enter our lives.

During this period, we will have low tolerance for people who are only around to create dysfunction—or to continuously take, with no effort to mutually maintain and build the relationship. Those whose energy radiates with authenticity, integrity, and sincerity are the ones we will feel magnetically pulled toward, and we will discover that as we refuse to settle for less, people with pure intentions will flow our way.

The next part of this year is intensely powerful for manifesting exactly what it is we want, where we want to be, and who we hope will surround us. It is up to us to put the effort in now, so that we can end the year celebrating with people we love and appreciate and who feel the same way bout us in return—and at a stage where we can look around with pride at what we have achieved and close 2018 on the highest note.

Everything in the universe occurs in cycles, and yearly cycles are ones where we are able to look back at how far we’ve traveled, how much soul growth has taken place, and also where we can learn from anything or anyone that has disrupted our path in some way. It all happens for a divine reason—but at the same time, we are also creators of our own destiny, so the faster we transcend lessons and patterns, the quicker we will attract magnificent possibilities and magical happenings will enter our lives.

Gemini is so divinely placed as this six-month chapter comes to an end, as it is the “twin” energy and shows us how it is our individual choice as to whether we focus on darkness or light, our Jekyll or Hyde personalities, and that whichever one we put our time, energy, and attention into is the one that will ultimately win out.

It is the ideal time to move closer to integrating both our dark and light sides, so that we accept that everything exists—good, bad, pretty, ugly, dark, light, and all in between. We can then try to fully accept ourselves (and those around us) on an entirely different level.

We all have darkness and light—however, we don’t all make the same choices, and we don’t all behave in the same way. Our thoughts, feelings, and actions depend on which side we decide to give power to, so if we want to live a highly vibrational, beautiful life, it is vital that we choose wisely.

A supermoon triad is a supercharged energy portal in which masses of luminous energy is believed to infiltrate Earth’s atmosphere. Absorbing it can be overstimulating, which might make us feel emotional, drained, and fatigued, and we may also notice the following occurring:”

Crazy in crestone, out 2027

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